My friends at WGN! NOT!

jeweler jim

[font=times new roman,times,serif]As some of you know we have been inundated with an infestation of bald eagles at my house. Twenty to thirty of them perched like vultures in the trees and flying around between my place and Lizzie's. This in turn has caused a non stop problem of trespassing by every Tom, Dick and Harry in the world coming onto the property to view "these amazing birds." Constant parade of cars parking in front of our garages and people wandering everywhere with cameras who become upset when you tell them to leave (our entitled society). Seven instances of the two words "NO TRESPASSING" at the entrance to the subdivision and more after you enter and some have the balls to say "you should have put up signs." All private property maintained by us with no public roads in or out.[/font]<br />
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[font=times new roman,times,serif]Cops are doing the best they can to help, but really they're busy with many more important things.[/font]<br />
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[font=times new roman,times,serif]Now comes WGN, who ran a segment last night about the eagles in Cary with pictures that also ID'ed our property. They omitted pictures of any No Trespassing signs. Do you think the traffic will increase today? [/font]<br />
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[font=times new roman,times,serif]I'm at the point where I'd like to stand at port arms with a ten gauge at the entrance. Spring can't come soon enough with its open water and the departure of the birds.[/font]

dd

As the World Turns!

I M Portly

Jim: As you know, I'm always up for a good meal. I wonder if eagles would make good pot pies? Portly.

dd

You are approaching it wrong , JJ! Stand out at the street and charge $20 admission.

whiskey river mike

where's my gun......................<br /><br />It's a sign................

jeweler jim

[font=times new roman,times,serif]Actually one of the cops suggested that we could charge $20.00 a piece for viewing and I asked if that would cover the liability insurance. Then it wasn't such a good idea anymore. [/font]<br />
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[font=times new roman,times,serif]Thinking the spring thaw will open water in other areas and most if not all of them will leave again.[/font]

Snidely Whiplash

JJ,<br />
<br />
Isn't it your turn to host the annual "SASS Spring Shotgun Festival" this year? /><br />
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You and the family should go out of town for the weekend and make numerous credit card purchases and cameos in front of security cameras, while some of us stand on your property and charge admission (cash only). If anyone slips and complains, you have plausible deniability. <br />
<br />
While your "guests" are busy with the birds, have some entertaining bumper stickers to apply to their vehicles. Bonus points if someone knows someone with a tow truck. We could videotape the vehicles being towed away from the no-trespassing signs, or just have the cars towed away quietly and left in front of fire hydrants, or blocking anti-gun people's driveways.<br />
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Alternatively, if someone has a taxidermished bird of prey, we could put that out on a cardboard table and stand around with our doubles turning people away, stating "we're trying to get another to make bookends."<br />
<br />
Snidely Whiplash

Orrin Sackett

JJ, I notified my Environmental Biology class, the college birding group, the Northern Illinois Ornithological Society, the Rockford chapter of The Audubon Society, the Rock Valley College wildlife group, the ecology club, the "Watch the Eagles Fly Around" club, and most of the elementary and middle schools within a 50 mile radius of me that you were looking to raise awareness about the early spring habits of our national bird by hosting daily tours on your property. Please watch for them arriving and allow them to set up their tents, tripods, photography equipment, bird attracting audio equipment, grills, marching bands, banners, and air quality testing equipment on your property (I may have told them you wouldn't mind). Also, I may have inadvertently mentioned that they could use your bathroom and kitchen facilities at their leisure. Please feel free to post some pics of the fun you are having, and you are welcome (I know how fond you are of unannounced strangers). <br />
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P.S. Some of the groups mentioned nightly candle-light vigils complete with many avian-soothing songs being sung by only the best juvenile eagle impersonators. It may sound like a bunch of screeching and cawing to you, but trust me, the eagles will love it. Thanks again for your kind hospitality.

jeweler jim

[font=times new roman,times,serif]You better hope we ain't at the same loading table at the same time next season. Another friend of mine suggested I take the ten gauge and clean out the infestation and throw the carcasses out onto Rt. 14 (eagle carcasses that is). Put my boots on this AM and had to reset a couple of the no trespassing signs. Would really like to be setting a few booby traps along with them. That and a few spike strips so they wouldn't be able to evade the cops. [/font]<br />
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[font=times new roman,times,serif]I just want to be friends with everyone.[/font]

Ugly

I'm sorry for your bother but; shoot/kill an American Bald Eagle, go to jail. (I'm pretty sure; at least the law used to read that way) It IS the symbol of our country; hell, it's even illegal to own an eagle feather.

jeweler jim

'Ugly' wrote:

<br />
I'm sorry for your bother but; shoot/kill an American Bald Eagle, go to jail. (I'm pretty sure; at least the law used to read that way) It IS the symbol of our country; hell, it's even illegal to own an eagle feather.<br />

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[font=times new roman', times, serif]Just running my mouth Ug. Know what would happen if'n I was that stupid. Have had one of our "Native American" friends tell me he wants any feathers that I might find and wouldn't even pick those up off the ground and pass them along for fear of getting trouble. He's welcome to look and take anything he finds but having one of my wife's relatives working for the Feds (Fish & Wildlife) I know what can happen and how ugly they can get about stuff like that. [/font]<br />
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[font='times new roman', ', times, serif} ']P.S. Now that there's open water[/font][font='times new roman', ', times, serif} '] everywhere they have thankfully moved on along with eight Grey Pelicans that also decided our place was appropriate for a stopover on the way north. [/font]