Home Defense

Saguaro Kid

A liberal acquaintance in California asked me what I thought he might<br />
need in order to defend his house and family from home invasion, and the like.<br />
I suggested a 9mm, a couple of clips, and a box of shells.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />

dd

Well, you spread the shells around on the floor. That is your intrusion alarm, you will hear crunching and screaming as the intruder's feet are cut. Then you sneak up behind him and hit him over the head with the wrench. Before he can recover, you clamp the clips onto his nether regions. This will keep him occupied while you call 911.